The Basement is great is a song sung by The Salesman and the ginger orphans in "The Trial of Cooper".
Lyrics[]
Cooper: Oh my God. We're getting out of here.
The future's never been so clear.
I'll leave with ya.
I wanna flee with ya, wanna be with ya.
Vanessa: Oh, well see, you're not really my type.
I already have plans tonight.
I gotta go.
I gotta leave solo. That means alone.
The Salesman: Hey, everybody! Not so fast!
This place is really not so bad!
It's home to me,
And you are all sort of my family.
Gingers: That door has not been left ajar.
We've never seen outside so far.
What is out there?
Is there a place for kids with ginger hair?
The Salesman: Scooper, I don't know.
Scooper, it's a great big world.
The basement is a dinghy boat.
The gale wind's giddy hurl,
And out there is a fire.
We'll choke up on the embers.
Your own mom couldn't take it.
Now don't you remember?
Gingers: We've been waiting for it way too long,
To see a non-guilty verdict go to some lonely ginger boy.
Black Ginger: But now the door is open. We're feeling fine.
We're starting to realize that we can leave anytime.
The Salesman: Fools, I can't believe what I'm seeing.
Three steaks a day and the memories we've shared.
This parrot-dise you are considering leaving.
As free-range orphans, how well they have fared.
The basement is great.
Cooper: Oh no it isn't.
The Salesman: The basement's our fate.
Cooper: Oh, please just quit it.
The Salesman: The basement is sewn into the cloth of my soul.
There's no home like this subterranean hole.
The basement is great.
Cooper: Oh, please be quiet.
The Salesman: The basement's our fate,
And don't deny it.
The door isn't shut and I can't handle that.
We've gotta go back to the status quo stat.
Cooper: You fucking psycho.
You're deranged.
Nobody even knows your name.
Don't you dare go and close that door.
I can not take this anymore!
The Salesman: The basement is great!
Gingers: Oh, no it isn't!
The Salesman: Three squares a day?
Gingers: Oh, no you didn't!
The Salesman: You wanna leave me, just like my papa?
Then to your freedom, say ta-ta!
The Salesman (Speaking): A ha ha ha ha ha! A ha ha ha ha ha!
Cooper (Speaking): WAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHH!!!
Um.
Cooper: It's easy to get down in the basement,
And beyond these walls, you think that no one cares,
But I'm here to let you know, I don't always let it show,
That there's a song in all the hearts of those with ginger hair.
Gingers: Solidarity-darity.
It changes everything.
Ginger hair, you see-hair, you see.
A common anchoring.
The Salesman: He looked just like me.
Down to the red hair and musta~ache.
You've got to kill,
Your confidence in me.
In we.
You've got to kill,
Your confidence for me,
To succeed.
There's one explanation.
Kindly follow along.
I'll clarify through a song.
Imagine a salesman going from door to door,
And killing the owners of unkempt carpet floors.
Was he a monster?
Cooper (Speaking): Yes!
The Salesman: A homicical troll?
Cooper (Speaking): YES!
The Salesman: Or was he just craving,
The thing we call control?
You're not Madame Trinkett's
Or under parrot reign.
This playhouse is my domain!
Cooper: You think we're yours.
You think you're tough.
I think we've all had quite enough.
I'm gunna get us out of here.
I'll never ever quit.
I'm sorry that you've had it bad,
But you won't move beyond your dad,
Living like a maniac,
In pools of parrot shit.
The Salesman (Speaking): Stop!
The Salesman: The basement is great.
Cooper: You can't come with me.
The Salesman: The basement's your fate.
Cooper: You can't come with me.
I know a mean comumbly.
There's no use to pretend,
But I know I can beat you,
By calling you my friend.
The Salesman (Speaking): (Gasp!)
Gingers: Solidarity-darity!
It changes everything.
Ginger hair, you see-hair, you see.
A common anchoring.
Cooper: Solidarity-darity.
The Salesman: Looked just like me.
Cooper: Ginger hair, you see-hair, you see.
The Salesman: Down to his red hai~hai~hair.
Cooper: You could call this a friend request.
The Salesman: I don't believe it.
Cooper: I am sending an S.O.S.
The Salesman: I won't recieve it.
Cooper: We could be good friends. The best!
The Salesman: You really mean it?
Cooper: I am sending a friend request.
The Salesman: I accept!
Gingers: We've been waiting for it way too long,
But now the wait's over and we can go live our lives.
So, let's join hands and we can get a move on.
There's so much to see. It's a great big world outside.
Trivia[]
- Several previous songs are briefly reprised during this song, such as "Living Life Underground", "He Looked Just Like Me", and "Waiting for it Way Too Long".